ilities. where do they come from?

I heard an ad on the radio yesterday that really made me stop and think. The ad was for a college that was advocating it was "the" place to get ility. Yes, ility. As in capability, ability, flexibility, responsibility etc. As I listened, I thought "where did I get my ilities?" The answer was immediate and resounding: My parents.

I have a large "family of origin" -- eight siblings. My parents had babies over 18 years. Really, two families in some senses. I am child number seven, but there are almost six years in between me and the next oldest. Children number eight & nine followed me rather closely. My Dad told me once that I was an accident, Becky was to keep me company, and Janette was "oh well, what the hell!"

We didn't have a lot of "things" growing up, but we did have family, and we did have love. There were no entitlements at our house - we worked. Ok, I have realized as I have gotten older that the pay for summer berry picking may have been subsidized depending on our age, but work was still expected. We each had to earn enough to purchase our school clothes for the coming year. How's that for learning how to budget?!

Mom was home always. Always. Dad working the land, and always other jobs, too, providing for his family. Dinners together every night. I remember my childhood as happy. Good. Not perfect, of course, but safe. Stable. Carefree.

Traditions. Sunday dinner after church. Popcorn and top-of-the-stove cookies Sunday night. Christmas Eve cookie deliveries to the neighbors while Santa came to our house. Having to wait for Mom to come to the car on Easter Sunday...that was the one Sunday she was always late getting ready. Coming home from church to find Easter baskets hidden through-out the house.

Mom and Dad provided a firm foundation. A foundation that gave us stability and the freedom to explore. From that foundation, we each have been able to grow. My parents raised nine children into caring, creative, capable, and contributing adults.

I am hopeful that I can honor my parents by striving to continue their tradition. The tradition of providing a firm foundation for my children that will allow and spur them to continue their growth into caring, creative, capable, and contributing adults.

I am filled with thankfulness to my parents for all that they gave to me. I realize the gift of that strong foundation did not come without great personal sacrifice and cost to them.

But I am even more thankful for them. As people. Not just what they did, but for who they are.

I miss my Mom. Tremendously. I love my Dad. Tremendously.